My family recently attended the funeral of a close friend of ours, Joan Middleton.  Joan was a truly selfless person, seeking to make the lives of others better, up until her own death.  Even while she was battling cancer she would lament that she felt so powerless not being able to help care for others.

Joan embodied social responsibility, an important EQ quality. Social responsibility is, “willingly contributing to society, to one’s social groups and generally to the welfare of others” (Student EQ Edge, p.139).

At her funeral and then later at a reception, many gave account of Joan’s good deeds done for them over the years.  Though she died during the summer holiday, many choir students from the school willingly volunteered to attend her funeral and give tribute to her life by song.  All attested to Joan’s love for others and her self -sacrificing deeds.

Each year Joan’s school did a fund raising activity. Joan was not rich that she might have something incredibly valuable to donate to the auction, to raise money for the school. What Joan could do was cook!  I was the recipient of her berry pies, baked ziti etc. etc.  Everyone raved about Joan’s cooking and her infamous cinnamon rolls. Joan decided to do what she could for the auction. She made a big batch of cinnamon rolls that were auctioned at the fund raising event. Her infamous cinnamon rolls garnered a cash contribution of $10,000 USD!  Those are some great cinnamon rolls!

Joan and her husband, Jim, hosted Chinese girls during our summer programs each year. They loved these girls as their own: taking them to fine restaurants, buying them phones, celebrating their birthdays, networking for them etc.  Each of the girls they hosted sent fond words of affection for Joan, upon her passing. One even came from her home in New York to attend the funeral and give tribute to Joan at the reception.  Joan had a lasting impact on these girls who were so far removed from her own country. Joan’s love for others transcended cultures, religions and socio-economic status.

The most selfless person I have ever known was Jesus. He said: “Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds” (The Bible-Gospel of John, 12:24).  He was speaking of His own death and the seed it would produce, but I believe He was also speaking of those who would “selflessly die” to their own desires and seek to help others. If WE will put others before ourselves, we too will see lasting “seed” and good produced in the lives of others. Joan’s life and many other lives are testament of  the good that comes when we give our lives away to benefit others.  EQ now also teaches us that true life is not found in hoarding or thinking only of ourselves, but rather the truly successful life is lived with the wellbeing of others in mind.

As Stein and Beck point out, social responsibility, because it is directed outward, is perhaps the easiest component of EQ to change and improve. We can all become more socially responsible without a great deal of help. But, for added inspiration and ideas these thoughts and this exercise may help:  Social Responsibility exercise